People disappoint each other every day. Some times it’s on purpose, but most of the time it’s unintentional. There are several different ways to deal with the conflict of disappointment. You can ignore it and deal with the disappointment, you can grow angry and argue, or you can remain calm and offer feedback about it.
I often opt not to say anything because I struggle with conflict. I would often suffer myself rather than engage in conflict, but I’m working to become more comfortable with conflict. There are other times, like with my parents, that I respond with anger for being let down. Fighting doesn’t accomplish anything either, especially, when you only need to say what you are feeling.
As I’ve practiced saying what I think, I also learned that it is best to offer constructive criticism at the right times. If you are hurt because of something, it has little impact to say something about it a month later. If you wait that long, it’s likely you won’t say anything about the thing that bothered you in the first place. Think aout it being better to get it over with it that helps. You may also not want to react too quickly. If something hurts you, I think it’s a good idea to go away, process how you feel, think about what you want to say and more forward to offer feedback to the other person.
This is extremely important if you manage people. Managers don’t need to wait until the six month review to unload all their employees’ disappointments onto them.It’s better to provide the feedback at the appropriate time to give the employee an opportunity to make adjustments rather than carrying on with a disappointing behavior for too long. Doing so will foster trust and growth in the employee.
It’s also important for parents to give timely feedback to kids. If a parent doesn’t want to discipline children, they’re setting the entire family up for drama and heartbreak in the future.
Regardless of the disappointment you are experiencing, its most important to pick your battles. some conflicts aren’t worth saying a thing about while some can be great. Just face any discomfort that comes along with providing constructive criticism and deal with the issues at hand.